Dear A, Part One

 This is the first part of the story that I will be posting on here. I'll post as often as I can until I decide on a consistent schedule. Any feedback is appreciated. 

-S 

Dear A,

    It’s hard for me to believe that there will be no more you. That I won’t be seeing you at our local cafe. That your voice will no longer be a mere phone dial away.

    It’s hard for me to accept and understand, that your words can longer comfort me. That I must continue on, alone.

    I was alone for so long before you appeared into my life, before you changed everything. Before you engrained yourself into the deepest crevices of my everyday life.

    I can no longer remember what filled my days before you. How I used to bare drinking my morning coffee solo. The local cafe was my escape before everything changed. And after you came into my life it became our shared haven. No I cannot stand the thought of entering its french doors.

    I pass by sometimes, and Phillipe, the barista calls out to me. He tells me they have a new flavor scone, or muffin. He asks me to come in when I have a chance. But I won’t walk in those doors anymore. I will no longer be sharing a blueberry scone with you, my love. Everything is tasteless now, even colors seem much more dull. I feel as though someone has placed lenses before me, to fade the color of life from my view.

    I try to shake it off, I try to be positive, it’s what I know you would have wanted. But after you left, after you were no longer beside me, it’s like I’ve forgotten how to be. You were my personal supply of oxygen, and joy.

    I’m running on empty now.

Until next time,

Your B